Monday, March 26, 2007

On the weirdness of young children:

In the last 7 days I have lost count of the number of times I have called Megan "Weirdo."

"What?" you say. “But, she is such a sweet child. You really shouldn’t call her names. That’s not setting a good example.” Whatevs, Goody-Two-Shoes.

Yes, I have resorted to name-calling. For example, Megan has been licking things when she is taking a shower. The shower wall, shampoo bottle, my leg, etc. With the shampoo bottle and the wall, that’s easy enough to nip in the bud. “Ewww, gross- the walls/that shampoo bottle isn’t clean.” But when she licks ME, well, she gets the reaction that anyone else would deliver- a shriek, a jump, and a “Stop it, Weirdo!” which sends her collapsing into a pile of giggles on the floor of the shower. Mostly the reaction on my part is so extreme due to her timing- she waits until I am eyes-closed, rinsing my hair or something, then… LICK! And I lose it.

She has also started an anti-anything-but-dresses campaign, down to how she wants to be dressed at bedtime. No pajamas with shorts or pants anymore- she wants to wear DRESS pajamas to sleep! Now, fortunately I had a parental lightbulb go-off over my head, and I offered her my t-shirt collection to choose her evening dresses from. Why is this weird? It’s not- the fact that she can go from completely clothed to stark naked in the blink of an eye, and she does, is what makes me chuckle “Weirdo.” “Megan? What would you like for breakfast?” says this mom to a clothed child. “Umm, I would like oatmeal- REGULAR oatmeal, mamma- with honey. Please.” Says a nightgowned Megan. “Okay- REGULAR oatmeal with honey. Coming right up!” I say as I turn to the cabinet and grab the oatmeal box, and when I turn around- presto-chango! – naked, beaming Megan is standing there.

(Oh, that last post's picture was taken right after the events described above.)

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